Monday, September 24, 2012

Monday Good Humor

Remembering Jokes that make me laugh:
My father's favorite DuPont story -> "Better Living Through Chemistry" - Mrs. DuPont and Mrs. Scott of 'Scott Paper Company' had a running rivalry regarding their husband's corporate creations. One day during a bridge luncheon they both attended regularly, Mrs. Scott told Mrs. DuPont that her husband's company had just created a toilet paper that was so soft and so efficient at cleansing that it would be the customers' favorite choice. Never to be 'out done', Mrs. DuPont exclaimed that once her husband's R & D Chemical and Pharmaceutical engineer's product hit the markets, the need for toilet paper would be greatly diminished!
Mrs. Scott replied that she was delusional with her fantasy. Au contraire, said Mrs. DuPont. With one daily capsule, the solids that were to be eliminated would leave the body wrapped neatly in cellophane. !!!!

Dr. AM's rhyming timing:

The Farmer's Daughters. Once a farmer had 4 teen-aged daughters that he fiercely kept from dating. On one Saturday, all 4 pleaded with their father, saying they had each met someone nice they would like to go out with and he could meet the boys with his shotgun as they came over for their pre-arranged dates.

That evening, the farmer sat in his rocker next to the front door, with his shotgun across his lap.
The first boy approached him and said: "Hello Sir, My name is Eddy and I'm here to date Betty. We are going out for Spaghetti. Is she ready? "   Father farmer yelled in the house for Betty to come out side and he allowed them to leave together to go get spaghetti.

The second boy drove up to the house and approached the farmer. "Hello Sir, My name is Lance. I'm here to take Nancy to a square dance. Has she dressed fancy and remembered her petty-pants?"
Father farmer yelled for Nancy to come out side  and be sure to wear her long petty-pants - and he allowed them to drive off to the dance.

The third boy arrived on a bicycle built for two and introduced himself: "Good evening Sir, my name is Joe.
I'm here to date Flo. We're going to the picture show. Is she ready to go?"
Father farmer yelled inside for Flo and let her go on the bicycle with Joe to the picture show.

The fourth boy arrived and greeted Father farmer: Howdy Mister, My name is Chuck.
With that, the farmer aimed the shotgun at him and fired.

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